Ejection report

Ejection report



So this week-end was a real humdinger.

A pushed tournament schedule.
Rain and power pushed Friday’s games to Saturday and that pushed Saturday down.

Saturday
Red vs. blue (me at the plate)
Red coach refuses to come to the plate while we wait for him to write out his line up. He could have done that while he waited the 30 mins (damn should have thought of that at the time).
Then during the plate meeting he refuses to listen and would not even face the other coach or my self or my partner. I covered 2 of the 6 things in plate before I said "we will flip and you (blue) were here first so you get to call it.
My partner said really is that all?
Yes that is the important things and we will cover the rest when they come up.
Blue loses the flip
My partner said this is going to be a rough game
Red wants to know why
I said rough crowd rough game
My partner said we are on the clock
Red get your boys on the field and get them to work
They need to warm up
No they have got to warm up get them on the field
No we need to warm up you are running 30 mins late that is your fault
No it is not my fault and you will get them on the field
No we need to warm up
You are burning his clock too now get to work]
Red says the other coach "we will get on the field in 3 or five minutes"
No will get on the field now you have had 10 mins already
No we have not
I pull out my watch and look at it yes you have now get on the field
Some dad gets on the field for something and yells "let’s not worry about little arms lets just stay on schedule"
I say to the red coach “you are responsible for your spectators this is your one and only warning"
He gets his boys on the field.
Three pitches in and off the plate by two balls red coach says "WHAT?"
I take off my mask "and say very nicely "We are not going to go there today am I clear?"
No nod, no acknowledgement, but I know he knows
I have a thing that was taught to me in all my clinics about game management "do not let the batters stand and time the pitches while the pitcher is warming up. They are to be in the dirt circle. If you do they could get beaned by the pitcher in the box and if I let them time then I better not say a word about the intentional pitch." So I do not let them do so.
At one point the red coach asks me "why not let them cross?"
I reply "because I said so."
He wants to know "is it a rule?"
Yes it is
At what level?
USSSA to high school to college to major leagues
Really?
Yes it states that the umpire behind the plate is in charge and because I say they can't, they can't.
Oh
And now every half it are trying to get on the other side.
About the fifth inning in reds batter bunts and is in fair territory I call batter out and send everyone back
He wants to know why
I said he was in fair territory when he struck the ball it is a dead ball play no one advances
He says he knows that
Then why did you ask
I wanted to know why the batter was out
And I told you that the batter was in fair territory when he struck the ball and it is a dead play no one advances what is the problem?
No problem.
Then after the half he wants to know where his player was
I told him he was in fair territory (with out moving from my position on the side)
I know but exactly where was his foot
Ok sure I will do you a favor and I step just out side of where the box would be and in font of the plate
Ok
then he goes to the back stop where all the fucking whinny dads are and they begin to have a conversation about "he can't see balls and strikes how can he see where the foot is?" today I am fresh and full of Job and patience I let it go in retrospect or the next day I should have popped the dad on the spot.
The coach bitches and whines like a school girl about how he is never coming here for another tournament (but the babies all say the same thing but guess who you see later next month?)
Game finishes and that is Saturday

Sunday is a bitch it was 100ºF 87% humidity and every field is running late and I have commitments that evening
Blue vs. white (different blue) (me on bases [I hate the bases more work than the plate and I am not in charge])
Blue is whining about some of the pitches but too bad nothing serious and that is my partner’s problem, not mine.
A couple of pick off move that were not even close and you can hear the thunder on the horizon. I have a hungry near sighted coach. Ah Hah! Something is going to happen.
A play at second from the catcher to short not even freaking close!
Blue jumps up and screams "Jesus make a call!"
I call time and motion for the coach to come out to me (I make it a long walk too).
Coach I will not tolerate another out burst like that this is your one and only warning. Am I clear?
He nods
I am sorry I have a deaf ear I did not hear your answer
Yes
Ok then let’s finish the game.
Yes I know I am a fucker at times but you can not sit there in the fucking shade on a fucking bucket over 80' and watch me make a safe call and tell me that I am not making calls. I am making fucking calls all over the place I made calls at first and I made calls at second and I made calls at third. Safe is a call. When I am in B and C position I make calls in the out field too "catch" "no-catch"
Make a call indeed! Harumpff bastard coach whose breath smells of ass!

Red vs. green (different red) (me at the plate)
Plate is nice and crisp but I smell shit in the air.
Greens second batter is rung up on an outside pitch clearly a strike be he just fucking froze. He bangs the plate and yells "that was not a strike!"
I call time and I approach the coach "that player is now on warning for sportsmanship conduct another out burst and I will eject him"
Yes sir that was not tolerable and we will fix it ASAP
Thank you
Top of two the pitcher throws 3 balls off the plate (as far off the plate as three balls) the catcher is signaling they are strikes. On the fourth that was a high pitch at the damn freaking shoulder the parents become a choir.
On the second walk they break into a rendition "oh my god" "that is terrible" "he is horrible pick" "a damn strike zone" it is an eruption of wailing to their pagan baseball gods.
I call time I approach red's coach
Sir you are responsible for your spectators this is your warning and you will not get another do you understand.
No I do not
Well let me explain it to you then
You are responsible for your players your coaches and your spectators. Your spectators are not behaving in a sportsman like manner that is expected from the stands as well in the dug out.
But they are fans I have no control
Then you better because I will eject you for them
You can not do that
You are now just arguing with me, go to the parking lot!
What you can not do that

Which ones
I turn and with out really looking that one and that one
Why them
Because I was asked to pick and they were closest to the parking lot
I can not do that
Ok let me make it easier for you then. You and a player. you want to pick or no let me, you number one....
I will go
I turn go back to the plate I hold the game until I saw him walk past the backstop.
the tournament director came up shortly and asked what is happening
I explain the the stands were arguing balls and strikes I gave the coach a warning he began to argue with me I sent him to the parking lot and he argues soem more so I began to pick players to be ejected.
did you eject a player
No not yet but if it keeps up I will
At this point some old stinky man walked up and began to yell at me. I went back to my game.
The reds catcher began rolling his eyes on every ball call and on every play that was safe he would yell "of course they are not going to call that". (You know here I thought I was being nice)I finally bent down and told the catcher that he better not say any more like that because he can be replaced. (I could have talked to the coach and just gave him his warning right then but I was meaning to give the catcher two this one and then the one to the coach if it continued) But this was clearly a mistake on my part. I should have just replaced the catcher from the top of remarks and been done with it.
Red loses and I am baked. I am fucking down. I lost my 3:30 game because of all the games running late (they gave the game to someone else)
I am at my car getting undressed and the red team is passing through the parking lot and stinky comes shuffling through
"That was the worst game ever"
Thank you. Have a nice day sir
He begins to walk towards telling about how terrible I was.
Sir does not come any closer
Do not step any closer
I reached for my phone
I am going to call the police if you come any closer
He stopped when I put the phone to my ear
You said you were going to eject the catcher to get into his head he said.
No that is not what was said.
Trailing cries of anguish as I explain to dispatch that I no longer was in need of a police officer.
Yes ma'am I am ok there is no danger. I am an umpire and I thought I was going to have trouble with a fan but he has decided to depart. Sorry to have bothered you. Yes I am sure.
They called back. LOL no ma'am everything is all right.

You know if they would just enforce day care for the parents and mandate coaching classes for the managers my life would be easier and I would probably get paid less. Oh well
Happy day it is Monday and I am still alive.

Ejection Report

Coach pitch 7:30 game
Red vs White
Game start was 7:39
partner on plate
Top of 4th 1 out runner on second
Vistors 9
Home 3
Ball was hit hard down 3rd base line
partner calls foul coaches run the players regardless
Runner on second crosses home and partner is still calling foul.
Red coach comes running down first base line yelling and waving his arms "Who called foul?" "Who called foul?" (Coach had been hostile and challenging through out the game).
partner indicates she called foul and he yelled some more and began to get into partner’s face.
I stepped up and the coach yelled at me "How can she call foul?"
I replied “Because the ball was fielded in foul territory”
He yelled and I told him to calm down
He yelled and I told him to stop yelling at me
He yelled and I told him this was his last warning
He yelled and I told him that he was to leave the game and that he was done.
He yelled some more and then he tried to stay in the dugout and yell some more.
I told him that he was to go to the parking lot.

baseball this saturday

Blue vs Yellow
Close tag play at second
Partner calls him out
The yellow coach charges the field "how can you call him out?"
My partner looks to him "first of all coach there is a live ball on the field and you need to call time, now go back and ask for time."
He goes back to the foul line calls time my partner grants the coach just yells at him about his call
partner: "now coach that will be enough there is no need to act this way.
Coach: blah blah more yelling
partner: No coach that will be enough
coach: i am not trying to argue with you but blah blah more yelling
Partner: that is enough you need to stop
Me: coach coach COACH!
Coach (now turns on me): he can not make that call he was out of...
Me: my partner said that will be enough you are not listening that will he enough
coach: He can not
Me: no that is enough
coach: i am not arguing
Me: no that is enough
coach: But
Me: No coach you are down to stopping this now or the parking lot
coach: No listen he not in position he can not
Me: No coach you are done that is enough you are to go to the parking lot
Me: no coach to the parking lot
he leaves we finish the game
i talk to the tourney director
he talks to the team
he comes back and asks did you give him a warning?
yes several
They said you did not
Well they are wrong
Yeah they usually are
The director talks to the UIC
the UIC says that a warning must contain the word warning
Crap shit fuck damn shit fucking damn fuckers.

I fucked a rule and I missed another ejection on a player yellow batter runner collided with first baseman in a malicious manner but I missed it enough to not call it and then in mental replay I should have thrown the player out.
The rule. When the pitcher steps off and wild throws it is two bases not one shit damn shit damn

You can not do what i do

I am calling this post;
If you can not do what I do, do not try to tell me how to do it.

My life is a dead corpse and I am exposed naked flesh of my mothers sins and father transgressions.
My torture is the ropes of my past pressed into my throat and my genitals are stuffed into my mouth.
My tears are acid on my cheeks cutting through the dirt of my failures.
My screams are the thunderous laughter of a sitcom laugh track being played over the actions of my enemies stabbing me in the back.
My world is lit with demon fire spot lighting my fears.
My failures are graffiti on the walls for the world to see.


Other notes of my past week
Baseball everyday last week except one day of softball. I can not remember a single incident to mention.
This week end I did 13 games
Friday no issues
Saturday two in the morn with my son
I double plated for him as he felt under the weather.
When we were done he commented on how well I ran the games and that my zone was rock solid
Then I had two 14's
Good games. But I was a prick and did not mean to be. (For once can you believe it?)
I had a banger at first from "C" I rang the boy up for the third out.
The coach came to me and asked if he could appeal that call
Without meaning to I chuckled and said "absolutely not I saw that play all the way in and it was my call"
He turns and shoots a drive by I felt the foot was pulled hats all.
I think about what I said and how I sounded and asked my partner "was I just a prick?"
Well you sounded cocky
Shit that was not what I meant at all
Should I go talk to the coach about it?
naw it is too late he can just stew on it but this is how you should have approached it. And he instructed me on the proper conversation
Then I close the day with 2 more games with my son
Again I had a banger at 1st from "C" but this time I was out of angle but the ball got there first punched the ticket
1st base coach called time I looked and him he asked the right way " hey blue can you get some help on that because the foot was off the bag and your partner may have seen it better from his angle."
I turn and there is the other coach trying to chew on my partner.
Coach get to your box now. it is my call But but
No, coach go back to your place
He began to argue and I started to turn I was going to drop the whole thing right there.
He left to his box
I ask my partner was the foot off or on?
it was off
shit shit shit this is going to suck!
yeah I know
are you sure?
yes I am sure it is going to suck
I smile
Ok then here comes the shit storm
I turn "runner is safe get the team back on the field.
Screams and yells and crying and yelling
The defensive coach starts to yell at my partner
I step up
Coach that is my call talk to me
How can you let him over turn that
That is not the way to do that
No coach he did not over turn anything
Yes he did
No I was asked the correct way if I could get some help since I was angled out and may have missed the pulled foot.
I asked for another angle I got some input and I changed my call
Now get your team on the field
he starts "you know I have played pro ball for eight years and umpired too and you guys always seem to screw this up"
This conversation is over get your team on the field and get in the dugout I turn
The team piles back on and the coach asks for a warm up for his pitcher
No he does not need one.
What why not
Because I said so
After a run scores they get the third out.
I walk up to my partner as the coach is chewing on my partner
I start to explain again and gets quippy with my tone gets loud (bad thing)
Why are you yelling at me
I am not yelling I talking louder because you are not listening
Yes I am
No you are not. Because I said this conversation is over and you are still trying to talk about this
I am talking to your partner about the play
While I am here to talk to him and you are looking at me as you talk that means you are talking to me about something I told you was over. See you do not listen
I stand there looking at him not saying a word he finally walks away.
My partner said you know you interrupted me as I was bout to eject him
Oh man I am sorry shit your first ejection I took it away from you I am so sorry really I feel real bad
That’s ok let me handle my game my way.
Yes you are right I am sorry
I stayed out after that.
Then I was on the plate for the last game of the day and I had contact at the plate I deemed non-malicious but he was out
The defense wanted an ejection
I told it was not malicious and that the boy was attempting to slid. he was going down head first with his hands out looking at the ground, his hands never
Made contact with the catcher but they did collide
Coach yelled at me about how a slide works I just look at him blankly
Then I saw coach I know what a feet first slide is and what it looks like but I do not know why you are screaming at me about something I have already ruled on.
Now go back to the dug out and never approach me like this again.
I turned and went back to the plate.
Sunday
14s
I got many compliments about my zone from both sides.
My partners all said I could have gotten a little wider but in all I was rock solid.
My last 14yo game
Green was losing by a huge number and it was down to the last 12 minutes
Dribbler to short
Short scoops and throws late (he double pumped) but it gets there in time and the runner throws his shoulder into the first basemen knocking him down
I point that is malicious and the runner is ejected just as my partner is doing the same
The coach comes to me
Are you really ejecting my player?
Yes
\ This late in the game
Yes I do not want to see him on the field or in your dugout.
But that was not malicious the fielder was covering the bag
No coach your player had an avenue to the bag that did not require throwing his shoulder into the basemen and you know it
So he is ejected?
Yes coach he is ejected.
We finish the game and green loses.
I close the day on an 11AAA consolation game with a team that ate my lunch last year
And the only thing they could chirp about was a third strike that may have been dropped
I was obstructed and I looked at my partner for indication I got none so let them start the throw to first
My partner calls the batter out that the strike was caught and A fucker dad yells well he was not saying anything
I turn with a big smile on my face to him (He was outside but I talked to him anyways) your catcher blocked my view so that made the call my partners call and I do not have to make that call if the catcher blocks my view.
Everyone laughed at the dad and the frankness of the whole exchange like yeah you know that!
Not another peep from fucker
the game came down to 9 to 0 at the top of 4 visitor still can not score so now at bottom of 4 we get a walk and he steals second a bad throw puts him on his way to third and a pass ball puts the ball into the dugout fence it rattles about by the fence and touches a non player standing out side of the dug out.
Dead ball runner goes home ball game
The coaches all knew that was the right call and they just said "line up"
That was my horribly slow and boring weekend
I know I am late with another review but I was working till 10:30 every night last week and this week too.

9A

Two games one by my self. i should have thought about it and left the plate shoes at the car and just worn the field shoes they are much lighter.
I had someone passing by at the end of the first game and jump on to help me out. Thanks!
9A what can i say the pitches were either right there or they were not.
At one point i had R3 and a ball four walk. batter-runner trots up to first and then breaks to second.
the defensive coach calls time. I grant. he asks "thought that was a ball four walk"
it was
then i am kind of wondering why the runner is standing on second base.
Because he stole second
oh, can he do that?
If he could not i would have sent him back.
Oh Ok then
we play and the game finishes no-one is hurt and no-one is too made.
i am again asked about the second base steal i explain it to him and that is is
second game had not a thing to note and i was sharp and my timing was awesome!

8AA Coach Pitch

1 game
I was sloppy i did not like my game at all.
Coach pitching is a pitcher not a coach but i let him act the part of a coach.
my outs were good and my safes were crap.
I lost the count once and may have kicked a call at 2nd base. it was a banger and i called safe. thinking back i should have called out because the little hop off the bag may not have been off the bag at all.
These are the little things that just eat my lunch for days afterwards.
especially when it looks like the coach was managing me fuck fuck fuck.
The pitcher coach came to me calling interference as i was watching the ball in the outfield. then said do not call it is ok.
then began to complain about the boy on the bag blocking the bag. i told the coach that i was working hard for him and that if there was obstruction i would see it.
the coach from the other team came to me and asked about the conversation i told him the coach was saying that there was interference at third but i was making sure the ball was a catch/no catch. and before i could finish the statement the coach asked for time to talk to his baseman. i said yes i gave 30 seconds and then told him we were ready to play he made a drive by comment about rushing him off the field.
I told him he asked for time i gave him plenty of time and to get off the field.
I should have told the coach complaining about interference to keep mum and that he was just a pitcher.
These things just tear me up.

Saturday 6 baseball

14a
a couple things to note. need some zone resharpening and work on my damn timing.
had a player look at me on a good third strike call and say "are you serious? that was i the dirt!"
told the coach i was not going to put up with that from any of the players

bases good.

10a
coach was a jerk. first he refused to show at the plate meeting then he came late and interrupted with everything that was already covered. I told his assistant that he was still the one to talk to me if there was a question.
great game got pegged alot.
called a batters interference and the batter cried. coach wanted a warning and i told him not at this level.
second game nothing to note slow and quite.

10a
had a pass ball on a third base lead third baseman grabbed the runner as the runner tried to advance. wished i could have awarded first.
out of play over throw awarded home from second (runner had achieved second and was on way to third) coached wanted a ruling explained that one base on dugout two on out of play. coach then said he knew that he just wanted to test me.
I told the coach that i had all the testing to get certified and that i would not have to take any more test.
he looked at me and knew what i meant.