You can not do what i do

I am calling this post;
If you can not do what I do, do not try to tell me how to do it.

My life is a dead corpse and I am exposed naked flesh of my mothers sins and father transgressions.
My torture is the ropes of my past pressed into my throat and my genitals are stuffed into my mouth.
My tears are acid on my cheeks cutting through the dirt of my failures.
My screams are the thunderous laughter of a sitcom laugh track being played over the actions of my enemies stabbing me in the back.
My world is lit with demon fire spot lighting my fears.
My failures are graffiti on the walls for the world to see.


Other notes of my past week
Baseball everyday last week except one day of softball. I can not remember a single incident to mention.
This week end I did 13 games
Friday no issues
Saturday two in the morn with my son
I double plated for him as he felt under the weather.
When we were done he commented on how well I ran the games and that my zone was rock solid
Then I had two 14's
Good games. But I was a prick and did not mean to be. (For once can you believe it?)
I had a banger at first from "C" I rang the boy up for the third out.
The coach came to me and asked if he could appeal that call
Without meaning to I chuckled and said "absolutely not I saw that play all the way in and it was my call"
He turns and shoots a drive by I felt the foot was pulled hats all.
I think about what I said and how I sounded and asked my partner "was I just a prick?"
Well you sounded cocky
Shit that was not what I meant at all
Should I go talk to the coach about it?
naw it is too late he can just stew on it but this is how you should have approached it. And he instructed me on the proper conversation
Then I close the day with 2 more games with my son
Again I had a banger at 1st from "C" but this time I was out of angle but the ball got there first punched the ticket
1st base coach called time I looked and him he asked the right way " hey blue can you get some help on that because the foot was off the bag and your partner may have seen it better from his angle."
I turn and there is the other coach trying to chew on my partner.
Coach get to your box now. it is my call But but
No, coach go back to your place
He began to argue and I started to turn I was going to drop the whole thing right there.
He left to his box
I ask my partner was the foot off or on?
it was off
shit shit shit this is going to suck!
yeah I know
are you sure?
yes I am sure it is going to suck
I smile
Ok then here comes the shit storm
I turn "runner is safe get the team back on the field.
Screams and yells and crying and yelling
The defensive coach starts to yell at my partner
I step up
Coach that is my call talk to me
How can you let him over turn that
That is not the way to do that
No coach he did not over turn anything
Yes he did
No I was asked the correct way if I could get some help since I was angled out and may have missed the pulled foot.
I asked for another angle I got some input and I changed my call
Now get your team on the field
he starts "you know I have played pro ball for eight years and umpired too and you guys always seem to screw this up"
This conversation is over get your team on the field and get in the dugout I turn
The team piles back on and the coach asks for a warm up for his pitcher
No he does not need one.
What why not
Because I said so
After a run scores they get the third out.
I walk up to my partner as the coach is chewing on my partner
I start to explain again and gets quippy with my tone gets loud (bad thing)
Why are you yelling at me
I am not yelling I talking louder because you are not listening
Yes I am
No you are not. Because I said this conversation is over and you are still trying to talk about this
I am talking to your partner about the play
While I am here to talk to him and you are looking at me as you talk that means you are talking to me about something I told you was over. See you do not listen
I stand there looking at him not saying a word he finally walks away.
My partner said you know you interrupted me as I was bout to eject him
Oh man I am sorry shit your first ejection I took it away from you I am so sorry really I feel real bad
That’s ok let me handle my game my way.
Yes you are right I am sorry
I stayed out after that.
Then I was on the plate for the last game of the day and I had contact at the plate I deemed non-malicious but he was out
The defense wanted an ejection
I told it was not malicious and that the boy was attempting to slid. he was going down head first with his hands out looking at the ground, his hands never
Made contact with the catcher but they did collide
Coach yelled at me about how a slide works I just look at him blankly
Then I saw coach I know what a feet first slide is and what it looks like but I do not know why you are screaming at me about something I have already ruled on.
Now go back to the dug out and never approach me like this again.
I turned and went back to the plate.
Sunday
14s
I got many compliments about my zone from both sides.
My partners all said I could have gotten a little wider but in all I was rock solid.
My last 14yo game
Green was losing by a huge number and it was down to the last 12 minutes
Dribbler to short
Short scoops and throws late (he double pumped) but it gets there in time and the runner throws his shoulder into the first basemen knocking him down
I point that is malicious and the runner is ejected just as my partner is doing the same
The coach comes to me
Are you really ejecting my player?
Yes
\ This late in the game
Yes I do not want to see him on the field or in your dugout.
But that was not malicious the fielder was covering the bag
No coach your player had an avenue to the bag that did not require throwing his shoulder into the basemen and you know it
So he is ejected?
Yes coach he is ejected.
We finish the game and green loses.
I close the day on an 11AAA consolation game with a team that ate my lunch last year
And the only thing they could chirp about was a third strike that may have been dropped
I was obstructed and I looked at my partner for indication I got none so let them start the throw to first
My partner calls the batter out that the strike was caught and A fucker dad yells well he was not saying anything
I turn with a big smile on my face to him (He was outside but I talked to him anyways) your catcher blocked my view so that made the call my partners call and I do not have to make that call if the catcher blocks my view.
Everyone laughed at the dad and the frankness of the whole exchange like yeah you know that!
Not another peep from fucker
the game came down to 9 to 0 at the top of 4 visitor still can not score so now at bottom of 4 we get a walk and he steals second a bad throw puts him on his way to third and a pass ball puts the ball into the dugout fence it rattles about by the fence and touches a non player standing out side of the dug out.
Dead ball runner goes home ball game
The coaches all knew that was the right call and they just said "line up"
That was my horribly slow and boring weekend
I know I am late with another review but I was working till 10:30 every night last week and this week too.

9A

Two games one by my self. i should have thought about it and left the plate shoes at the car and just worn the field shoes they are much lighter.
I had someone passing by at the end of the first game and jump on to help me out. Thanks!
9A what can i say the pitches were either right there or they were not.
At one point i had R3 and a ball four walk. batter-runner trots up to first and then breaks to second.
the defensive coach calls time. I grant. he asks "thought that was a ball four walk"
it was
then i am kind of wondering why the runner is standing on second base.
Because he stole second
oh, can he do that?
If he could not i would have sent him back.
Oh Ok then
we play and the game finishes no-one is hurt and no-one is too made.
i am again asked about the second base steal i explain it to him and that is is
second game had not a thing to note and i was sharp and my timing was awesome!

8AA Coach Pitch

1 game
I was sloppy i did not like my game at all.
Coach pitching is a pitcher not a coach but i let him act the part of a coach.
my outs were good and my safes were crap.
I lost the count once and may have kicked a call at 2nd base. it was a banger and i called safe. thinking back i should have called out because the little hop off the bag may not have been off the bag at all.
These are the little things that just eat my lunch for days afterwards.
especially when it looks like the coach was managing me fuck fuck fuck.
The pitcher coach came to me calling interference as i was watching the ball in the outfield. then said do not call it is ok.
then began to complain about the boy on the bag blocking the bag. i told the coach that i was working hard for him and that if there was obstruction i would see it.
the coach from the other team came to me and asked about the conversation i told him the coach was saying that there was interference at third but i was making sure the ball was a catch/no catch. and before i could finish the statement the coach asked for time to talk to his baseman. i said yes i gave 30 seconds and then told him we were ready to play he made a drive by comment about rushing him off the field.
I told him he asked for time i gave him plenty of time and to get off the field.
I should have told the coach complaining about interference to keep mum and that he was just a pitcher.
These things just tear me up.

Saturday 6 baseball

14a
a couple things to note. need some zone resharpening and work on my damn timing.
had a player look at me on a good third strike call and say "are you serious? that was i the dirt!"
told the coach i was not going to put up with that from any of the players

bases good.

10a
coach was a jerk. first he refused to show at the plate meeting then he came late and interrupted with everything that was already covered. I told his assistant that he was still the one to talk to me if there was a question.
great game got pegged alot.
called a batters interference and the batter cried. coach wanted a warning and i told him not at this level.
second game nothing to note slow and quite.

10a
had a pass ball on a third base lead third baseman grabbed the runner as the runner tried to advance. wished i could have awarded first.
out of play over throw awarded home from second (runner had achieved second and was on way to third) coached wanted a ruling explained that one base on dugout two on out of play. coach then said he knew that he just wanted to test me.
I told the coach that i had all the testing to get certified and that i would not have to take any more test.
he looked at me and knew what i meant.

Rec league

Thursday
Softball
Two games 10U and 18U. nothing to really note. i was sloppy on bases and lost the number of walks on the plate (two walks then coach assist).